boku no namae wa joker des~

The first time I watched Dark Knight was almost a year ago. During that time, I don't feel much because I took it as entertainment and watching it for fun since everybody's seen it but me. This is the 2nd time I watch this movie again, a few days ago, my judgments were different now, which I would like to share my views here.

If you feel that Joker is a villain, Batman as an American hero, Alfred is the friend to that American hero (a British) You're right, and wrong. To me, Batman is not a hero in Dark Knight. Yeah, it's a Batman movie.. but he isn't the hero in my eyes lol

I'm just gonna be a bit more realistic, not that I don't wanna be like the neo-noir Tim Burton with his dark background and full of mystery sort. But I guess I just like a clearer background and less comical relief. Not always be in Batman's hiding ground. I think this movie really show the world who exactly is this Batman. I'm just gonna talk about Batman and Joker here.

Harvey Dent is a mirror to this capitalist political world who is finaly disappointed with the ugly world of politic, and under the advise of Joker, he finally became a pejuang rakyat (ppl who fight for the right of the citizen)

Batman is the alterego of this human call Bruce Wayne, is a Capitalist who is very powerful in Gotham City.

Joker is not a villain or a terrorist. To me, he's a people's hero who fights like a gerilla. I lack pity to Gotham citizen who fell victim to Joker because they are bastards who put money as a top priority, plus they are Capitalist. So when Joker crashed Bruce Wayne's party, he is attacking the Capitalist. He also attacked the police and judge. To Joker, police and judge are the shadow puppets controlled by the Capitalists who rule Gotham city.

My cousins were watching the movie with me at the time too when I mentioned Joker being a hero. They asked me, how can I call him a hero after he blows up a ferry full of ppl? Well.. its coz they are Capitalists. And I guess I can also see how selfish these ppl are.

There are 2 ferries. One with normal citizens. The other is prisoners. The selfish normal citizens asked the terrorists to go blow up the ferry with the prisoners. What an easy decision for them to make. For them, they have to live on so that they can continue having their Capitalist descendants. But for the prisoners, they were fighting and arguing.. until one of them throw the key into the sea and that, in my eyes, they are leaving it in the hands of the Lord. They know that they are the victims of the Capitalist (create hardships of life to many ppl) and caused them to become criminals (I mean, how many ppl would wanna become a criminal for fun anyways)

Joker's fight has frightened the Capitalists until Batman has to create a new weapon. This is the world of this godamn Capitalist, WEAPONS. This is what I think why Batman didn't kill Joker, coz Batman needed Joker to test his weapon on. Without Joker, his weapon is useless and therefore can't make it into a profitable business.

Then to why Joker didn't join the mafia.. Hey, don't forget that mafia are also from Capitalist. But just bcoz they are not officially registered, thats why they are mafias. In the end, Joker killed all these mafias. If mafia is a crime, in this movie, so who destroyed these criminals? Police? Batman? No.. Joker did. Joker's mission is damn big. He will destroy the Capitalist to the core. Blowing up a hospital is not the meaning of the loss of humanity, but its a symbol of destroying the Capitalists who makan duit rakyat (take citizen's money more than it should) and bribery.

This film shows Joker at his best. And God bless Heath Ledger too. RIP. He has carried out the character who is one of the best hero ever!

In Malaysia, it's not much difrent from Dark Knight. I feel that UMNO and MCA are like the Capitalist. And PAS is the mafia. Najib is like Batman who wanna be a hero to destroy those who disturbs his businesses. Batman with all his weapons and gadgets, same like Najib who always buy weapons. This movie can dedicate to Malaysia's geopolitics bcoz he is the "dark knight"


Especially the Chinese ppl should.. some ppl think we goyang kaki just bcoz this ethnicity has conquered a lot of the lands and businesses in this beloved country we call Malaysia. But that will be in another story in another post later.. why so serrioouusss~

the real terrorists...

Israel is currently bombing women, children, religious centers and civilian neighborhoods in Gaza. Because their victims are Muslim, they think they can hide behind the "War on Terror" excuse.

What the hell?!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AHMDUFRVQOg

Children should have the right to live without fear and hate...

Confession Booth

I believe in regret

I believe in self-sacrifice

I believe in free will

I believe in wrong and right

I believe in good and evil

I believe in God

But...

I don't believe in insane or sane anymore...

I believe that we are who we are, and we don't need more illusions over our heads, controlling our already short lives. I believe that the meaning of each individual life is to make his/her own meanings. To find the best way to live, to grow out of this world.

What I say next might confuse or anger some people. Whoever who read this post, please, listen first and try understand why I said it...

"You will never love someone/something more than you love yourself."

The reason why I said this is because I feel that Love is understanding. That when you love someone, you're actually attracted to him/her because it reminds you of yourself, or the things that you enjoyed. It is always You, this is how our minds are made.

The reason why this idea is not as bad as it sounds is because, even if you will only love yourself the most, only then you are able to love others the way they wanted to be loved.

Love is the easiest thing to get, but the hardest to lose.

He is back in my life, as generous as light and for the moment, the blocked moment of Solitude within me might be filled with fire and water again.

The Life they wanted You to have

You will be born fair and beautiful, into a happy religious home (questioning nothing), with 2 happy parents that never fight. You will eat healthily, and get plenty of exercises. Then go to school with happy teachers that enjoy teaching you. At a school with no violence, no cursing, no free sexual acts, and with other religious students. It should go on this way all the way up to high school and in all these times, you won't have a serious girl/boyfriend and you must be happy and sin-free. After school, you will go to college. Then you'd choose a high-paying job (coz money is the only way you're going to be happy) You will finish college in about 25 or so. At this time, you start work. In your free time, you find love, have kids and live in your big house with flawless religious happiness forevermore. Nothing bad happens, nobody learns, evythg is "perfect"...and nobody knows different.

I feel like drowning when I wrote this. Like my weak withered arms can barely keep me floating. Saltwater pours down my throat every seconds. Weaker and weaker to fight anymore. Even if I know somebody who will jump down to save me, I'd still want to feel like I worth it. Worth their energy, am I worth saving. Maybe the world is showing me that they still cared...my luck I'd prolly pull them down with me.

But who knows? Maybe I'll see someone with a Life Jacket. All I know is, I have to learn to swim. So that I wouldn't always have to wonder if I'm going to be rescued or not.

*closes eyes and laughs quietly to myself**

What I truly feel abt Goth

Being Goth? Turning Goth? What is Goth anyway? Is Goth all about wearing black and everything? Or is it some kind of a cult or smthg influencing the young minds?? The question is, what am I turning into? I don’t know, it’s like a go with the flow situation…am I really a Goth? What's in a name anyway, quote Shakespeare "A rose with any other names smells just as sweet"

Many people would have gotten the wrong idea about goth, I don't know when exactly I started to have certain interests on this and hence on my confidence somehow had boosted. I am suffering inside for putting up a mask for the world to see by thinking within the black box. I tend to move towards the artistic point of view. I never met anybody who can really change my perspective on what my life is all about or gonna improve, not even until now. I build this cage with MY OWN hands

Only if it’s that simple, my dear friend. The world will be with no war, no famine, no crime, no abortion, and God will smile down on the world with his godly smirk forevermore and bless us all with raining pizzas from the skies.

I don’t wear black all the time or talk about death everytime I open my mouth lol xD

It’s ironic, I love many people around me and my close friends (those who do not make fun of me and call me nasty names) but I wonder why am I feeling discontent? Am I an ungrateful bard? No it’s not about me hating my life. Not the “Haha I don’t care” tude. I wanna live my life and wanna be different at the same time. I believe happiness is going to fit into the hole which is “YOU” and perhaps being a little Gothic trait in me can make me finally happy in my own sad little way ^__^

Censored evythg!!

It's not that I hate censorship, it's just I have this negative feeling everytime I hear this word whenever I browse around for my favorite artsy stuff everywhere I go. And I’m not a pervert lol. So does being Malaysian contributes to being conservative and all, does it even apply now?

I brought this topic out coz I can’t stand it anymore I just had to write this down somewhere. Whenever there is a censored material, it means somebody else already chose and decide what I will receive, see and hear. Why can't I get the advantage of making that choice myself? I feel that I should. The only thing that set my limit is “self-censorship”, which refers to my own judgements based on my inner conscience. But here, I’m referring to the public material censorship.

I think that everybody should have the right to communicate the way they wanted and observe what they like. Censorship only exists coz some people have decided that they don’t want to observe certain material. That’s why they consequentially inhibit this observation from the public. Do they have the rights, to begin with, your rights end where mine begins?? Then why should they challenge people with prohibitions after all?

It’s just an art illustration book from my favorite artist that I wanted to buy, for God’s sake =_=! Is it that explicit?

Let me state an example. Do you believe our local TV shows never depicts sexually explicit materials? Your answer may vary due to different clarifications. Some would argue that these seemingly explicit broadcasts are accidental and those who wanted to view the show do so, and those who don’t want do not. Is it that simple? I have a better idea for those who don’t want to or want to “avoid” viewing the material. Get rid of your TV. If you choose to watch TV, you will see these “accidental” materials.

TV stations cannot broadcast materials that are entirely acceptable, after all. Don’t you find it strange that some political commentary is not even censored in Malaysia’s media? “Dirty Politics” indeed. So why are some materials censored and others do not? This leads me to my next point.

I am a neutral person. I don’t believe in either appropriate or inappropriate materials. Not unless you caught your bf/gf, sis/bro, mom/dad, wife/husband (cats/dogs or your canaries…etc) reading some porn lol. But what I meant here is the way everything is so judged upon by the seemingly angelic society.

How can we we let people determine what we observe based on their assumptions on what’s appropriate/inappropriate? People only judge based on what has historically been accepted. But this basis doesn’t satisfy my questioning mind.

When I say “historically”, I meant that people (from the past) classify reasonable basis on standards about various materials. Don't we all experience it now? It's also called social liberalization anyways. Its example is easy to find! The amount of clothes have dwindled down considerably. The public is somewhat become more open to discuss drugs, sex, etc. If this continues rapid, what is the point of having censorships anymore? The amount of material to warrant as inappropriate is now so damn limited. But still, some people still wanted to lie and mislead the public, regulates them and censor -EVERYTHING-, for example a Luis Royo artbook that I wanted to buy.

I think our society doesn't need the goverment to regulate that massive censorship. It's hypocrite anyway. If people are aware of the material's explicitness, they can either choose to support it or likewise. TV, wanted to supply for market demands, can choose not to show sexual material without bounded by the so-called regulations. Either way, the market still get what they want and the people happy too. But this current system of censorship in Malaysia, not everybody will get their demands met. There is ALWAYS some people who will decide for you.

Sounds like Democracy to me, 'at its best' lol.

Workshop of Hope

I have always had this knack for Vincent Van Gogh ever since I was a kid until now I still do. I never knew what exactly about Vincent that appeals so much to me, and I had always thought that his paintings were the ugliest mutt I have ever seen. It's like I love and despise him at the same time. And I somehow found that the story of his life is so pathetic, yet romantic at the same time. A hopeless romantic, he was one of the most emotional artist I believe I have read about. I had a major crush over him as well his artwork ever since I was in primary school.

I felt that I shared certain similarities with this artist, we are emotional people who prefer to and ended up working individually and very attached to what we wanted to achieve. Largely self-taught. It's the I do what I like and I like what I do kinda attitude, but the sad state is that somehow the world is out there to pin you down. Tryin hard to pursue smthg to not only make a livin for, but to prove it to the world that this is being YOU is all about. Nobody to appreciate you and look down on what you do. Though I may not be influenced to cut my (ears) or shoot myself in the chest out of angst, I do feel the pain as such Vincent went through. He was my childhood hero, long-dead he may be, yet he still is and still am now. He made me feel less alone and I know that there is another one such person who suffers from the lack of self diligence. Just like me.

I had always admired the way Van Gogh applied paint on the canvas. He squeezed them directly from the tube onto the canvas and remodel it by using his brush to have this semi 3D effects. Recently, there were this new foundings by scientist that there were underlying images in one of Vincent's painting "Patch of Grass" (1885) where the seemingly insignificant wild strokes of brushes conceals a hidden face of a woman, whose features are much similar to his previous paintings of peasants e.g "The Potato Eaters". The image was concealed in a 7-inch square out of a larger piece of painting.

Vincent Van Gogh's life was virtually and largely unknown during his lifetime and he struggled financially to continue being the artist he wanted to be until he committed suicide in 1890. He reuses canvas to save money, either painting on top of or behind existing paintings. Scientists have found out that probably 1/3 of his works are still hiding behind a layer of another painting.

I wanted to visit The Hague someday, and the Yellow House. I wanna see his paintings! Especially the ones he made at Auvers. For me, Vincent is my model of the most astonishing artistic richness and I love the expressions which he conveyed through his paintings, which are more than mere paintings, they are my fundamental root in which I still am fighting for as well. I wanna be an artist, when the time comes I am released from this "invisible prison" it is on the top of my wishlist!

"I prefer to paint human eyes, rather than to paint cathedrals."

“They think I’m a madman because I wanted to be a true Christian.”

“I want to look at nature under a brighter sky.”

“I have a terrible need of — shall I say the word — religion. Then I go out and paint the stars.”

-VVG-